A Brief Pow Wow with the Ladies

Alright Ladies! Lets have a pow wow, the summer is here and I am already seeing some things that really need to be addressed. Personal style always takes confidence however confidence in a style that may not be so flattering comes off as a fail! (eyebrows raised)

Details Of An Artist

In the entrance of this year I understood the importance of transparency, and how it aids, affects and guides the life choices of others. For me like many of you transparency is/was something that you shielded and kept under wraps until you were home in your room amongst folks(me, myself and I) you knew and trusted, and then you became transparent with the truth you chose to believe, the lie you live and the reality of what the truth really is. I am learning that my truths are not only beneficial for a healthy life but also for the preserving and strengthening of another.

I think we as a people have really clichéd the term “keeping it real.” In my opinion “real” is the truth about who you are even at the worst parts. I am at a place in my life where I can admit that up to this point I have never felt good enough, strong enough, or worth anything to those around me. I know what it’s like to be in a room full of people and still be alone. To long to be a part of something greater then yourself but not having the courage to take the steps to get there, and later seeing the elevation of that thing and telling yourself that you were not worth it anyway.

I 've learned over time that no matter how different I may be, I am now who I was created to be to fulfill my own specific destiny, and though I have been looked over, talked about, and chosen last with little expectation by others. For me I am of some great quality hidden over time in my adversity, shielded from they who would have abused me as a gift, and buried in a chest as a treasure to be discovered by those who would honor and respect my shine, appreciating me enough to hold me close, but be so proud to have me that they showcase me in the glass displays of their lives.

I am coming into a greater understanding of life, and I can acknowledge that the life we live is not ours to live, but our lives are to be gifts to others. Embracing the individual, cherishing the life within, and walking in the honor that you were chosen to touch them "specifically." Something about your life was important enough, and valuable enough that your still here, all for the benefit of aiding another to live.

In my past I can admit that I gave away everything that I was not taught to value and in turn ended up with a whole lot of nothing, sharing myself with individuals who did not even realize, or respect the sacrifice that I made. As the greatest gift one can give to another is the untouched part of a whole self. As America is doing today I sold myself off in pieces sharing with those who discarded me in the end. Today through grace I can hold my head up high I may never be able to deny what I have done, but I’m clean and more whole then I was.

Today I see myself as quality, and with the valuable life I have left I seek to use it to affect positive change in the lives of others! In this life some of us fight more than others. I too had to fight, but know that sometimes you have to fight the battles of those who may not be strong enough to overcome on their own. So life sends you. I challenge you to keep fighting as many of the battles you fight today will become over whelming victories for multitudes tomorrow. Mahalia Jackson sang a song on the memorial during the Dr. King speech there and it sums it up

If I can help somebody
As I travel along
If I can help somebody
With a word or song
If I can help somebody
From doing wrong
My living shall not be in vain.

My living shall not be in vain
My living shall not be in vain
If I can help somebody 
While I'm singing this song
My living shall not be in vain

Today I speak to you who are late for purpose but right on time for destiny. Those of you who missed the buss of opportunity, but caught a cab for a life mandate. Live, laugh, love, and know that there is more t you then what you can see, there’s more in you then what you can feel, and the fact that your reading this proves that life has a need for you to be here! Love yourself, value your neighbor and share with the stranger. Touch a life today and change many lives tomorrow! Then your living will not be in vain.

Loving An Artist

I would consider myself an artist. Anyone who has spent any time with a person who operates out of a continual creative flow will tell you the mind of arty or creative people can be rather complex and difficult to understand. I have seen many creative people retreat to the background of life due to a continual feeling of always being misunderstood. It is easy for them to disappear but reveal themselves through the gifts they have learned to master. Art is the creative expression of one’s heart and the finest most pure interpretive manifestation of the contents of one soul.

As a stylist it is also my responsibility to be a great counselor to my clients that I’ve had for years (some say that’s why they keep coming). As I prepared my lady for her service she began to  release to me personal things going on with her husband( a man I went to school with and who is a great undiscovered writer and musician)she stated that often times she felt as though she was not good enough, or could not compare to the music. She expressed to me how often times she longed to captivate her husband in deep conversation but always proceeded with caution as she stated “her husband’s mind was so diverse and intricate that she feared she may not be able to keep up.” She went on, and through conversation I discovered that she had began to tighten her grasp on her husband. Limiting his space, sitting in rehearsals, planning her life around his as her insecurity began to eat at her and it for a moment cause her to react in a way that seemed right.

This was something all too common, many of my other friends who have spouses or significant others stated like things about their relationships. In the beginning of my marriage my wife shared the same concerns. One statement she made very early was “It is difficult to compete with what’s in you.” I admit I wish at that time I had the right words to say as my other half longed to be number one over my gift. To be honest I must state that a real artist or being or thrives on any type of creativity may always be a challenge due to the fact that our emotions, our inner sight, our thoughts, our mind are almost always with that which we have thrived on derived from the true spirit of creativity. Yes! It’s expressed differently, some through song, some through painting, others through acting, the gift of dance etc. The thing is that art itself is the elevated form of expression that’s conveyed from heart to heart speaking one message many different ways.

In any relationship there must be trust set in order. Your connection with trust is one of the most important things to establish. Just as you spent time learning your significant other you must learn how to read them through the love that you share, and the connection you have. In any relationship the connection must be so strong that your heart beats with theirs, your mind reads theirs, it’s something developed but it’s something that aids you in times when things may become a bit challenging. Lastly as I explained to my client, you can never love anyone with closed hands, I explained to her the moment you began to treat their creativity as an opponent you set yourself up to fight a battle you will lose. As you must remember, that these gifts have been with these people for most (if not all) of their lives. They have learned to download thru them, grieve, process, and or simply live. In everything there must always be balance, and in every situation we must learn how to still feed through our creative needs and still support and meet the needs of our relationships.

Every relationship has its challenges, its ups and its down but always remember that life must have a greater need for you to be together doing more to affect positive change with each other as opposed to separate! I think in any relationship at times it may be difficult, however I feel as though with arty individuals it may be a bit more difficult as if you are a person who has established creativity as your first love(in any form) you feel divided between the two loves of your life. The gift you've always been able to count on. Or the person in your life that you have now promised to be there for forever. It’s hard on both parties however these are some of the individualized issues you face when entering into a monogamous commitment with an artist. I hope this helped someone today!